March 25 Backpage

The Backpage

So maybe we didn’t win Beer Bike but who cares?

Reasons Why Hanszen Rocks My Face Off

• We have Ramma-jamma out the wazoo
• We can sit in another college’s Beer Bike section and convince them that it’s ours. Jones? Fuck Jones!
• We bleed blue and yellow
• Free printing! (we still have free printing right?)
• “I’m in a moat!”
• Norman Pai
• We have the best Secs on campus!

Reasons Why The Other Colleges Suck

• Wiess- they’re not even cool enough to have O-Week themes

• Will Rice- Beer Bike is the only thing they have going for them, otherwise they’d be worse off than Wiess

• Sid Rich- have you ever met anybody from Sid? I mean seriously

• Lovett- I legitimately feel sorry for Lovett sometimes. In all honesty, what do they have to be proud of?

• Baker- Baker women look like men

• Jones- that whole goat fetish thing just grosses me out

• Brown- Lars Charnsangavej be the only worthwhile thing that has come out of Brown

• Martel- you have to be an actual college to be the best

Sincerely,

Chethlyn

(haha people actually call us this now)