September 23rd Backpage

“Listen..I’m gonna let y’all read the Backpage but Beyonce had one of the best Backpages of all time….”- Kanye West

Hanszen’s ‘Brand Spankin’ New’ Freshmen Reps

Jarvis Knowles
*was one of Beyonce’s back up dancers in Single Ladies
* The “Facebook Ho” of Rice ‘13

Stephanie Huang
*Went to the same high school as Mike Z. Devastated when she found out she’d be in the same residential college as the “Woohoo!” guy

Jenna Haber
*“Ramya Ramanthan, wanna make out?”

*(see below)

Sid 80’s Party Recap
Jenna Haber will do anything to get on the Backpage (see above)
Will Rice sophomore refers to Mike Z and Natalia as Latino Barbie and Ken
Zach Panos, irate about frequent appearances in the Backpage, proceeds to plan “Barbie and Ken’s” wedding and ultimately designates Jenna Haber as the flower girl.


“This summer, I was researching my main project on water-softening and on the side I worked on a small project on nanoparticles. They have a 75% chance of curing cancer.” - Apoorv



-Chethlyn
(So excited for HMRC Fine Meats Friday Oct 2nd)